My Response to Bird by Bird

I can honestly say that I have never been given the task of reading an instructional manual of any sort for any class, especially one of this particular length. Having said that, I approached this task cautiously, not knowing what to expect of either the author, Anne Lamott, with whom I am not familiar, or the subject, creative writing, with which my only experience comes from the hours I spent conveying my feelings about the uneventful nature of Calculus class in high school on my rather abused and most definitely misused notebook. To my surprise, Bird by Bird, even at a glance, appeared neither dull, nor overtly informative. Every chapter was embellished with Lamott's dynamic personality, relevant anecdotes, hilarious asides, and topped off with an unparalleled yet irreducible, simplistic message about writing, rewriting, and even living, hence the full title of Lamott's piece, Bird by Bird: Some instructions on writing and life.

As I raced through each engaging chapter, one quickly caught my eye, perhaps because my generation views profanity as the dominant mode of self-expression, "Shitty First Drafts". In this chapter, Lamott laid out the blueprint for self-confidence as it pertains to writing. She argued that even the most affluent writers of our time don't just wake up "[...]feeling like a million dollars,feeling great about who they are and how much talent they have and what a great story they have to tell..." ( Lamott 21). She went on to discuss the process by which each literary masterpiece is crafted, buffered, remolded, and even destroyed completely, giving way to the craftsman's feeling of hopelessness, or alternatively finalized leading to his appreciation or even arrogance, rightfully so. From this chapter, I had a spiritual awakening of sorts, reminding me that perfection can be one's final goal as he struggles through a multitude of obstacles hindering his efforts, but that consequently the means by which he achieves perfection is often less than perfect, far from it. Shitty.

As I read the chapter in which Lamott discussed plot, my hatred grew for my tenth grade English teacher. "Always know where you're going with your story before picking up your pen." Clearly, Lamott does not share this view, and justifiably so. I too have come to abandon this archaic philosophy for a more hopeful one. Lamott argues that, in order for one's story to flow naturally and beautifully, he must adhere to the basic tendencies of his characters. A little tweak here, a little adjustment there, and your readers will discredit you as a reliable narrator, leading to a great setback as a "writer in training". Instead, how about allowing your plot to form naturally, orbiting around the interactions between your (hopefully) realistic characters? Simply lean back, kick your feet up, and watch your characters open window after window of initially unseen or unexpected opportunities, ones with which your plot will arm itself and become immune to even the most cynical critics.

After reading through the entire manual, I find myself well-equipped, at least in theory, to take on creative writing. Lamott has helped me overcome my fear of "shitty first drafts" as they have always haunted me, discouraged me, and even stopped me from picking up my pen and attacking the blank sheet of paper with the rigor I would have wanted to. I no longer fear failure, I invite it; one cannot improve if one does not take an honest inventory of his shortcomings. As with most things, creative writing is not worth doing if one does not enjoy it, that is the main lesson that I have extracted from this reading. Ultimately, it is our attitude that shapes our ability to either perform elegantly with unmatched enthusiasm and vibe, or poorly with pessimism and hopelessness. I hope for the former.